Every great song needs a pause between the notes. The same is true for leadership. Take a moment, breathe, and tune your heart back to harmony.

As leaders, we have our days. I am talking about the days where we feel our humanity and gaze at our limits. Sometimes that limit gazing leads to doubt. We doubt our purpose. We question our impact. We embrace our blunders and define them as reasons why we don’t matter.

There are times when self doubt takes the stage.
We begin to question our purpose.
We wonder if we make a difference.
We replay our mistakes and convince ourselves they define us.

Leadership can be lonely. I can certainly attest to that after almost twenty years in school administration. It is a loneliness that gnaws at you, the kind that can box you into becoming a castaway who is adrift, rudderless, isolated.

That is the irony of leadership. We are surrounded by people every day, students, teachers, families, and community members, yet the weight of decisions, the scrutiny, and the responsibility can still leave us feeling alone. There are joyful days, of course, but there are also those days when you must make the hard call, stand by your principles even when they are unpopular, and face the quiet stares that question your choices.

Those are the Am I Cut Out for This? days, echoing the title of my good friend Elizabeth Dampf’s recently published, powerful book.

---

When Doubt Knocks

Every leader faces those moments that stir imposter syndrome, stress, or even depression. It is easy to forget that leadership, as meaningful as it can be, does not define who we are.

Yes, the work might be a calling or vocation, but at its core, it is still a job. What truly defines us is the why behind what we do, our passions, dreams, and values that form the center of who we are.

The work can also be beautiful, impactful, and world changing.

Just the other day, I sat in a parent teacher conference with a parent I had once served years ago at another school. She smiled through tears as she said she was grateful her child was in a place where I could help. That simple moment reminded me that the echoes of our leadership often reach further than we realize. Those moments when we feel seen, valued, and appreciated are the quiet affirmations that we have helped others feel the same.

---

The Power of the Pause

We are human. We will doubt. We will stumble. But we must also give ourselves permission to pause.

We must be intentional about being present, especially with the people who loved us before we ever had a leadership title. Sometimes, the most courageous move we can make is to take a moment to reset.

Last year, I came across an insightful book, The Reset Mindset by Penny Zenker. It is filled with practical, grounded steps for slowing down, refocusing, and rediscovering purpose. The concept of “reset” has stuck with me ever since, not just as a leadership practice but as a way of living.

Here is my own adaptation, a simple reflection I call The 3 Minute Leadership Reset.

---

🎧 The 3 Minute Leadership Reset

1. Take a Breath (30 seconds)

Close your eyes.
Inhale slowly and say to yourself:

“I am still here.”

Exhale and say:

“I am enough.”

Do this three times. Feel your shoulders drop. Feel your pulse slow. You have just reclaimed your space in the moment.

---

2. Anchor in Gratitude (1 minute)

Ask yourself quietly:

• What one small moment today reminded me I am alive?
• What one connection, a smile, a song, a student, gave me a spark?
• What one thing am I proud of, even if no one noticed it?

Write it down in a notebook or say it aloud. That is your leadership echo, a reminder that small actions still ripple outward.

---

3. Affirm and Reframe (1 minute)

Say these words out loud, slowly and intentionally:

“I am not invisible. I am building something that lasts beyond applause.”
“My work is meaningful, even when it is quiet.”
“The music I make through service, kindness, and creativity still plays, whether or not the crowd is listening.”

Let those words live in your breath. You have just tuned your soul back to the right frequency.

---

4. Reconnect (30 seconds)

Before moving on with your day, take one small action to reconnect:

• Send a short message to a friend or colleague.
• Share a kind word with a student or staff member.
• Play a song that brings you joy.

These micro moments rebuild our leadership core from the inside out.

---

One More Thing

Remember this truth: Your presence matters.
There are people, family, friends, and colleagues, who love you simply for who you are. You are never truly alone.

There will be days when the gig feels heavy, isolating, and uncertain. But even in those moments, you have got this. And I believe in you.

As I often say on my podcast:

“Do not forget to share your dreams with the world. The world needs them, and you help make it a better place.”